Cognitive Dissonance

I am suffering from cognitiv dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is a psychological phenomenon which refers to the discomfort felt at a discrepancy between what you already know or believe, and new information or interpretation. For me, something that has brought me incredible joy and exhilaration is now the source of one of the most horrendous experience of my life to date. I really don't know what to make of my reality....